10 days into 2013

Hello sweeties,
how are you doing today? I am asking that in the most sincere way. Really, how are you feeling? I feel like right now there's a big divide between people feeling either extremely positive and motivated and the ones still hanging in that 'post Christmas omg what am I going to do with this new year filled with potential?' mood. I also think that one week into the new year is the moment resolutions are already given up on and we get down on ourselves for that. It sucks, I know.

I just came across an interview with Haylew Williams from Paramore which I found very honest and inspiring. Especially this quote of her's about the moment Paramore started 'falling apart' really stood out for me:

'...there were definitely days I would wake up and think it would be so easy to put up some sort of letter saying it's just too hard, we've had a good run, and go, like, get a job serving coffee or doing something normal. Maybe that would be less stressful. 

And then there were days that you would wake up and you would have a song in your head and know that there is purpose and there's freedom in being a musician and an artist, and you're really thankful.  Just like in everybody's life, there are ups and downs and there were doubtful moments, but there was something in the back of our minds that never let us give up.'

Numerous times, I too think of quitting. To just get a 'normal' job and just occasionly do a bit of art. It would be so much easier. No more deadlines, feeling like a sucky artist, others constantly criticizing you or having to 'compete' with a gazillion other artists. But yes, then there's that moment I create something I'm very proud of, or experience that wonderful calming effect working on art has on me and I feel very thankful and blessed and I know that deep down inside I shouldn't go easy on myself, and that I don't want to give up.

It all comes down to that little voice in the back of you mind telling you to push through. I know sometimes there's more than one voice, like the one telling you you're not good enough. But in the end they all want what's best for you. I feel like I cancelled out a lot of those other voices already, but that doesn't mean they don't come back every once in a while.

Keep going strong. Think of the brighter, warmer, blossoming days ahead and be grateful for all the little things. I really recommend making a little list on a daily list with all the things you're grateful for that day, no matter how small. Like today my list is:

♥ baking delicious muffins just for me
♥ incense
♥ The Princess Diaries
♥ painting my nails 

You matter, you are special and there are people who care about you. I believe love is most important in life, and everything else is inferior to it. Everything will turn out okay eventually. And then it will fall apart again. Once you accept that, life might just be a little bit lighter. :)

Blog resolutions.

For the new year, I really want to take my blog to the next level. It's gonna take some work, but I have decided that this 2013 is going to be the year of getting shit done!

♥ Post more art. This is a big one for me. Besides school stuff I'm really slacking off artistically and that's no good! Maybe I've got to start a weekly personal art update post to keep myself motivated.

♥ Do a blog make-over. This is really something that needs to happen. A nice, fresh, new look that fits better with who I am now. Something deep red and pink... It's gonna happen.

♥ Start doing outfit posts. I try dressing up nicely every single day, and even though I'm usually very pleased with my daily outfits I hardly ever take the time to document them! Reasons are probably my full body shot awkwardness and not being good at taking pictures like that in general. But I want to try getting better at that this year!

♥ Promote more/advertise on other blogs. Another pretty big one! People aren't just gonna find me among the gazillion blogs out there! I really want to put myself out there and get in touch with more fellow bloggers to share feedback or just a nice chat with n.n

♥ Write more inspiring/personal articles. I love writing. I write every single day. I'm not saying I'm good at it, I just love doing it. I always have so many things I'm thinking about or want to share my thoughts on with the hopes to inspire others. I hope that this year I can push myself to finish articles and maybe illustrate them with  my own work!

Goals and dreams for 2012

***

2011 really did flew by didn't it? I was just trying to sum up the year, only to realize most of the things I thought of were actually of 2010. This is what I wrote on the last day of the year last year:

I need to get the fuck over myself and apply for art school.
That's going to be my only new year's resolution.
I need some more social contacts as this is getting ridiculousBahhhhhhhh

And guess what!? Now I've already had my first few months of art school. The social contacts thing kind of... failed. But I'm fine with it and that's what matters right? 2011 has more or less been the beginning of my artistic career. I've dived deep into the artistic world (and grown a dangerous obession with art books) and moved out and created my very own inspirational little home.

I've decided to make some new year's resolutions, well, I've tried. Here are some of the to me most important ones:

Succesfully finish my first year of school

go to Japan/Tokyo

See Alkaline Trio liveread at least 8 books

Grow my hair even more

Take photographs every day

STAY POSITIVE

School really is my number one priority right now, but once summer is here I'm determined to go somewhere I've always wanted to go which ideally would be Tokyo. I'm also really hoping to see one of my all time favorite bands this year.. I've seen Bright Eyes live twice this year so Alkaline Trio is next up on the list!

And don't we all got to try to stay positive? I know it's quite a general thing, but it might be one of the greatest priorities in my life. I've really got to try to stay away from the dark places in my mind and find out all the ways to do so :)